She’s going to marry me, but it’s an unusual situation

Dear Amy: I’m writing in reference to my recent engagement,

I was alone for a long time and met a woman at work and fell deeply in love with her. Two nights a week, she comes to my place for dinner, and we are intimate. Then she leaves at 10 p.m.

Two months ago, I asked her to marry me and she said yes!

But our situation is very unusual.

She lives with the guy she has been with for 15 years. She has two children with him. They are not married and she told me there are no feelings or intimacy between them – and I believe that. But she still sleeps in the same bed with him.

I haven’t met her kids, and my place is too small to have them.

When she comes to my place and we are intimate and then she goes home, I have a hard time dealing with that.

I try not to think about it, but sometimes it gets the best of me.

Any advice? Am I being a fool?

– Foolish Fiance

Dear Fiance: There are different categories of fools. You are in the “fool-for-love” category. Being a fool for love is nothing to be ashamed of, but because you seem to be suffering from love-induced temporary insanity, I’m going to bluntly try to set you straight.

This is not going to work out. In fact, marrying her would be the worst-case scenario for you, because then you would be with someone who is both dishonest and morally bankrupt.

She has children, and she is already stealing time from them to be with you, but if she is the kind of person who would fully abandon her children to be with you, then this is not someone you could build a healthy future with.

So far, you two don’t seem to be even considering their welfare.