DEAR MISS MANNERS: A pal of mine has been conserving in contact with me by sending textual content messages that include one sentence solely: “How are you, Jen?”
He by no means shares something about himself, nor does he present any curiosity in my life past asking that one query.
In frustration, I texted him that I’m delighted and keen to listen to from him any time he has one thing significant to share, however that going ahead, I’ll not reply to one-sentence textual content messages.
He was offended at this and I’ve not heard from him since.
What do you consider this habits? I’m nonetheless a bit mystified by it and would love your opinion.
GENTLE READER: In a world the place lengthy, rambling textual content messages and lack of curiosity in others prevails, it appears to Miss Manners that your pal’s texts had been each succinct and empathetic. Until you aren’t offering her with the entire situation.
When you inform him how you might be and ask him how he’s, does he then go silent? If it truly is simply the one sentence after which crickets, Miss Manners will justify — and share — your mystification.
However it nonetheless doesn’t warrant the tirade you unleashed upon him.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: A pal, who professes to like me, behaved irrationally on a two-day go to to my home.
He says he’s at all times in lots of ache attributable to fibromyalgia, neuropathy and a tendon lacking in his shoulder.
I’ve two disintegrating discs urgent on nerves in my decrease again, which may be very painful.
Throughout his go to, I waited on him hand and foot whereas he lollygagged on a settee.
He went to take a bathe in my visitor bathtub, and apparently the bathe didn’t work nicely. He screamed and yelled on the high of his lungs, slammed the lavatory door after which slammed the door to the visitor bed room. He didn’t come out until the following morning, when he instructed me the bathroom within the visitor bathtub was plugged up and ordered me to deal with it.
I used to be furious and instructed him to deal with it himself. I felt fully disrespected and felt he handled my dwelling like a lodge.
He may have used the bathe in my toilet, however didn’t hassle asking. He additionally complained as a result of there have been no tissues within the bathtub, however I’ve further packing containers and will have fetched one.
I might be serious about your ideas.
GENTLE READER: This can be a very risky relationship.
If it survives this go to and you might be keen to attempt once more, Miss Manners suggests you sit your pal down and clarify that when you know he’s in ache, his habits at your home was unacceptable.
If he needs to stick with you, you’d be glad to offer him a tour of the place every part is and the way it works, however that you’ll not tolerate screaming and slamming if issues go awry.
Miss Manners additional advises that this dialog will go higher when you resist the urge to compete over your respective ache and accidents.
Please ship your inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, www.missmanners.com; to her e-mail, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or by way of postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.
