DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m 32 years previous, and I nonetheless don’t have my driver’s license.
This has all the time been a delicate problem for me, and whereas I do know it’s uncommon at my age, I simply don’t really feel comfy driving.
My household has been affected person over time, serving to me get round each time I want it, however recently, they’ve been vocal about their frustrations. They preserve pushing me to get my license and study to drive, saying it’s time for me to be extra unbiased.
The reality is, I’m actually frightened of studying the right way to drive. The concept of being behind the wheel makes me anxious, and I fear about the potential for stepping into an accident or making a mistake that might put myself and others at risk.
I really feel like nobody actually understands this concern; they only assume I’m being troublesome or lazy. Each time they bring about it up, it provides to my nervousness and makes me need to keep away from the entire matter altogether.
I don’t need to be a burden on my household, and I do know driving would make life simpler for everybody, together with myself.
How can I method this case in order that my household understands what I’m going by means of? And is there any approach to begin constructing confidence to lastly face my concern of driving?
— Concern of Driving
DEAR FEAR OF DRIVING: Going through your fears is sensible, even when you don’t grow to be a driver. On this method, you may conquer no matter is troubling you.
My suggestion can be to take a driver’s schooling class to learn to drive safely alongside an skilled driver. This fashion, you may develop accustomed to the sensation of being behind the wheel and controlling a automobile. It’s only a class, not a dedication to get the license.
If this appears too daunting, think about getting a therapist to work by means of this phobia with you. Even if you happen to by no means grow to be a driver, it’s good so that you can remove the concern and embrace your talents.
DEAR HARRIETTE: My pal instructed me some secrets and techniques from her firm, then she talked about that she had signed a nondisclosure settlement. I instructed her to not share the knowledge with anybody else, as it’s a part of the contract she signed.
She replied that I used to be simply overreacting and that nobody would discover out other than me.
I’m involved concerning the potential penalties if she shares these secrets and techniques. It’s vital for her to grasp the seriousness of the state of affairs. I need to help her, however I additionally want to assist her understand the dangers concerned.
What ought to I inform her to emphasise the significance of preserving this data confidential?
— Breach
DEAR BREACH: Sit your pal down and inform her you should have a critical dialog. Inform her you recognize how a lot she trusts you, however you don’t assume she understands the which means of confidentiality.
Clarify that it means she shouldn’t be telling you — or anybody else — something coated by that nondisclosure settlement.
She could recall how simply secrets and techniques unfold when she was a child. One individual would inform one other one thing and they’d promise to not share it, but by some means it sped alongside a communication path till everybody knew about it. The identical occurs with adults.
Once you violate an NDA, you run the danger of being sued, dropping your job or each. Encourage her to maintain protected data to herself.
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founding father of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to assist folks entry and activate their desires. You possibly can ship inquiries to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.
