I Have Been Begging My Spouse To Be Tidy, However She's Getting Worse

DEAR ABBY: I’m married with two kids, 6 and 4. I like them and my spouse.

Once I met her, I knew she was somewhat messy. I’m neat, tidy and customarily organized.

Over time, her habits (particularly, cleanliness and tidiness) has grown worse. It’s reached the purpose the place she leaves her chewed-off fingernails the place our youngsters play barefoot. She refuses to assist with family chores or to be a useful a part of the family.

I don’t desire a divorce as a result of I do know it could wreck the kids’s lives. I’ve been holding out whereas politely begging for a few of the cleanliness points to resolve, but it surely’s had zero affect.

I’m able to lose my thoughts, and my hair is visibly thinning from the stress. It’s like having a 3rd little one. What do I do?

— FRAZZLED IN FLORIDA

DEAR FRAZZLED: A spouse and mom whose habits and normal cleanliness have worsened to the purpose that she leaves her chewed-off fingernails on the ground the place her kids play could also be experiencing psychological issues.

Withdrawing as you may have described isn’t regular habits and might be a cry for assist.

Contact your medical insurance firm and your physician so your spouse will be evaluated bodily and neurologically. After that, you should have a greater concept of what to do. Whereas this might merely be the habits of a disorganized and harried housewife, I’m involved it might be extra.

DEAR ABBY: I’m a widow with two residing kids (one son died of COVID in 2021).

My daughter desires me to go on a cruise along with her subsequent 12 months. I don’t really feel comfy round crowds and unusual folks. This is because of shedding my son and the dearth of masking these days.

I informed my daughter no on the cruise. It harm her emotions, and now I’m the one feeling dangerous.

Ought to I really feel responsible as a result of I fear about my well being? I sustain with all my vaccinations, together with flu, and I’m wholesome, however I now not socialize as usually as I used to.

My physician has informed me that at my age it is very important at all times watch out. Your ideas?

— CAUTIOUS IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR CAUTIOUS: In mild of the details that you simply misplaced your son to COVID and that your physician has warned you to watch out, your warning is comprehensible.

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I have been begging my spouse to be tidy, however she’s getting worse

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