DEAR ABBY: There was a person I knew once I was youthful. He was a good friend of a good friend of mine. I came upon years later that he had had a crush on me.
Lengthy story brief, we went on a date. Apparently, it went higher for him than for me. After one date, I used to be “Baby,” and he thought we had been a pair! After I moved from California to Alabama, it didn’t deter him from appearing like we had been a pair.
I texted him, saying I didn’t need to damage him, however I couldn’t do a long-distance relationship. He despatched again a seething textual content about “not ever contacting him again.”
Did I do the mistaken factor? Ought to I’ve referred to as him? (I used to be scared to do that.)
— CONFUSED IN THE SOUTH
DEAR CONFUSED: The way in which you dealt with it was applicable. You had been appropriate to keep away from an disagreeable dialog, significantly since you sensed (rightly) that he wouldn’t take your message nicely.
DEAR ABBY: I’m apprehensive about my 21-year-old son, “Travis.”
He hasn’t fairly left our residence that he shares with me and my husband, however he sleeps right here just one or two nights. He’s at school half time and works half time, which implies working or finding out lengthy hours till morning.
What issues me is the place he’s staying. He refuses to disclose his location.
He says he’s with a girlfriend we haven’t met, and he stays out all night time lengthy. I’m apprehensive there is likely to be a drug downside, too. I attempt to name him to see if he’s OK, and I’ve to textual content and textual content simply to get a solution.
My husband doesn’t fear in any respect. He tells me to depart Travis alone, that he’s 21 and I’m loopy for worrying about what our son is doing.
Am I mistaken about this? How can I discover out what Travis is doing and attempt to get him assist?
— WORRIED MAMA IN GEORGIA
DEAR MAMA: Your son is now not a baby. He seems to be dealing with his job and research responsibly.
At 21, he deserves to have a non-public life, and you need to be capable to step again and permit him that. Take heed to your husband on this regard. He’s steering you in the fitting course.
DEAR ABBY: I’ve been married for 13 years to a beautiful man. A few years into our marriage, I used to be identified with uterine most cancers and needed to get a hysterectomy.
My sister, who’s three years older, doesn’t perceive what I went via. I needed youngsters, however now, due to the hysterectomy, I can’t have any.
How can I make her (and others) perceive that I’m grieving?
— NO ONE’S MOM IN WISCONSIN
DEAR NO ONE’S MOM: I’m sorry on your loss, which for a lot of childless ladies is a painful one. Nonetheless, not everyone seems to be empathetic sufficient to know that this ache is ongoing.
To those that, like your sister, don’t perceive, converse up. Nonetheless, if that is having a adverse affect in your life and relationships, please take into account speaking about it with a licensed psychotherapist.
Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
