DEAR ABBY: My oldest sister has it in her head that since she’s residence all week, she must exit each Sunday.
She began calling me each Saturday to ask me to accompany her, which I did a couple of occasions. In doing so, I noticed she has mobility points and the beginnings of dementia.
She desires to go to those sure locations the place we might all the time go. Different family and friends members used to accompany her, however now not do for legal responsibility causes. Therefore the rationale she turned to me. Apparently, she refuses to just accept her limitations.
My sister ought to use a walker and now not be driving however does each. I’m afraid and anxious. She retains calling me each weekend, and I’ve already run out of excuses.
I really feel horrible about this and don’t know the best way to deal with the state of affairs. I desperately want some recommendation. She clearly doesn’t get the hints.
— DESPERATE SIS IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR SIS: Cease hinting. Discuss to your different kin about what to do if, as your sister’s dementia will increase, somebody has to take her automobile away.
That she desires to get out of the home on weekends isn’t shocking, contemplating the truth that she’s cooped up there all week. Contact your nearest senior heart and inquire about supervised actions for seniors and transportation choices for individuals with disabilities.
Of us with reminiscence points even have been identified to get on the freeway desiring to drive to Sacramento solely to wind up in San Diego as a result of they misplaced their sense of path or misremembered their vacation spot. If essential, as a result of your sister could possibly be a hazard to herself and others on the highway, ship a letter to the DMV.
DEAR ABBY: My finest pal “Troy” and I hang around on a regular basis. We do every thing collectively, and other people typically mistake us for a pair.
Troy wouldn’t appropriate individuals till I mentioned one thing, however since then, I observed the way it began feeling extra like a relationship. We don’t maintain fingers or kiss, however he asks me what I’m doing, who I’m with and issues like that when he’s not round.
Each time we’re on the telephone we are saying “I love you” to one another earlier than hanging up. I’ve emotions for him. He says he doesn’t have the identical for me, however he’s the one who’s making it really feel prefer it’s a relationship.
I’ve requested him to cease as a result of it’s complicated, however it solely lasts for slightly bit earlier than we’re proper again to it.
I can’t inform if he desires a relationship however simply not with me, or if he doesn’t know for certain how he feels about me. What can I do about this? Are you able to assist?
— MIXED UP IN MONTANA
DEAR MIXED UP: You may have made clear that you really want a relationship with Troy. He has acknowledged plainly that he doesn’t have romantic emotions for you.
True, he enjoys your organization and tells you he loves you, however he doesn’t maintain fingers or kiss you. Most significantly, he doesn’t say he’s in love with you. Sadly, there’s nothing you are able to do about this.
In case you are on the lookout for a boyfriend, Troy is just not it. You seem like firmly within the pal zone. You may have my sympathy.
Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
