DEAR HARRIETTE: There’s this man I’ve been seeing, and now that we’re official, I’ve been spending much more time at his home. I just lately discovered a few unusual behavior of his that I don’t recognize.
He works in sanitation and sometimes has early morning shifts. When he leaves for work, he walks outdoors shirtless.
The primary time this occurred, I used to be shocked. I requested him the place he was going with out his clothes, and he stated his shirt was within the automotive. He was parked proper in entrance of his home, however I discovered it inappropriate.
I’ve seen him do that a number of instances. He claims he doesn’t wish to deliver his uniform into the home and would slightly simply put it on when he’s on his option to work.
I simply don’t perceive why he feels the necessity to stroll outdoors with solely half his clothes on. It’s a turnoff for me, fairly frankly. I feel an undershirt may very well be the straightforward reply to this drawback.
Am I blowing this out of proportion?
— Half-Bare
DEAR HALF-NAKED: Your boyfriend is being sensible. Working in sanitation signifies that his uniform is probably going not contemporary — even when he launders it often. Not bringing that into the home in all probability appears hygienic to him.
You might be going through an etiquette dilemma: You grew up believing individuals shouldn’t go outdoors undressed. How do you deal with this? Immediately. Inform your boyfriend that it makes you uncomfortable that he leaves the home half-naked. Clarify that it bothers you as a result of your worth system says that’s inappropriate. Ask him if he would take into account sporting an undershirt.
If he says no, you’ll have to resolve what you possibly can reside with. Individuals have every kind of quirks. Goes to his automotive shirtless a dealbreaker for you?
DEAR HARRIETTE: My buddy invited me to a celebration over the weekend. It’s been some time since I’ve been social, so I wished to get again on the market. I provided to select her and some different pals up.
Sooner or later, my buddy was encouraging me to take pictures of liquor, and in hopes of loosening up, I did. By the top of the night time, I used to be in no situation to drive.
I requested my buddy to stroll round a bit with me, however she complained in regards to the warmth and inspired me to drink water as a substitute. She wished to move to a different bar, and I wasn’t certain if I wished to affix. She referred to as a cab for herself and the opposite pals and informed me to go make up my thoughts in my automotive.
I don’t get why my buddy deserted me whereas I wasn’t sober. I ended up ready in my automotive for about two hours till I felt higher. She didn’t even textual content to ask if I used to be OK. I don’t know what dialog to have together with her.
— Below the Affect
DEAR UNDER THE INFLUENCE: She is just not your buddy. Anybody who would abandon you in that manner must be ashamed. Each time, if ever, you resolve to talk to her once more, inform her that her habits was inexcusable, egocentric and harmful — the alternative of something resembling friendship.
I’d additionally wish to commend you for taking the time to get sober earlier than getting behind the wheel. One other answer would have been to name a cab or rideshare.
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founding father of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to assist individuals entry and activate their goals. You may ship inquiries to [email protected] or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.
